— I’m Hurting, G0d —

 

Holidays are a JOYous time;
A time of family, and a time to enjoy the togetherness that a family brings.

But something is missing.
Some ONE is missing in my life, and that hurts.

The absence is an ache
which makes it hard to enjoy the blessings of this holiday season.

*

And I’m not alone;

*

I see this pain in others
as they dread these special days without the person who means so much.

Where is our blessing?

Where is the medicine
to ease our pain and bring a season we can truly enjoy?

I’m waiting.
I know my Loving Lord has an answer.

…

…

(Okay) Maybe my perspective got a little distorted.

Maybe holidays, THIS year, are a time to quietly say “thank you”
(for PAST gifts, opportunities, and memories).

— by Belinda in 1997 (aka Truthful Loving Kindness, after name-change)

 

Process of Grief and Loss is a huge part of life:  Rowena lived with us until she died when i was 5yo.  (I inherited her beautifully carved victorian-style table in picture above).  Raised with cousin Julie as sister 1yo thru 7yo — then gone from my life.  Dad’s cancer diagnosis 12yo.  My 21yo brother died just after i moved to Italy at 24yo. I moved back from Italy to be part of Dad’s live-in care-team at 26yo, and he died when i was 27yo.  Dreamed John’s death then he died 2mos later in 1989.  I lived with Connie (whom i called “Granny” & drew table below to represent her dining-room table, where we spent so much talking) when i moved to California in 1990.  During March 1997, I worked during the day & stayed with Connie at hospital during nights, so she would not need put in restraints.  The piece i wrote for her graveside eulogy is below.  Wrote the piece above during holidays that year.  We need to keep perspective during our processeS of grief and loss.  So very important.

Related Links.
Right-click on colored text and selecting “open in new tab”,
will allow you to return to this tab easily (at top of window) when you finish.
Remember, Links are on colored text, NOT the pictures.

Rowena/First Memories >> https://truthfulkindness.com/bnp/part-1/first-memories/

Julie/My Lost Years >> https://truthfulkindness.com/bnp/part-1/lost-yrs/

Dad’s Dx/Vacation after Surgery >> https://truthfulkindness.com/bnp/part-2/2b/vacation-surgery/

Spence/Justice >> https://truthfulkindness.com/bnp/part-2/2d/october-justice/

John >> https://truthfulkindness.com/bnp/part-2/2e/1989-feb-damn-it-hurts/

Mother’s Day for Connie >> https://truthfulkindness.com/bnp/part-3/mother-connie/

Those That Till >> https://truthfulkindness.com/bnp/part-3/those-that-till/

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