___ doesnt have dementia, end-quote

Love this quote used in poster that i found on blog entry here >> http://lilyemmaline.com/belittling-others/


“Forgive those who insult you, attack you, belittle you or take you for granted,
but more than this…
forgive yourself for allowing them to hurt you.”
— by unknown author

Tru here.  It is so very maddening when folks say “oh that person does not have dementia”, and belittle those who are trying to help others by sharing their symptoms and coping mechanisms in the public forum.  Even medical professionals within an organization will argue over whether a particular diagnosis is correct,  but at least they are professionals — and ideally they have as much data as can be currently gathered regarding the patient.

For us as persons with dementia, care-partners, family and friends, I think sometimes there is simply a need to understand that there are many factors involved in how quickly symptoms progress in a person with dementia.  Each person is different, and each progresses in different areas at different rates.  These are just my personal thoughts, and i have no medical background, just observation of family members and many friends with dementia thru the years:


Fixed Factors (currently nothing anyone can do about these factors):

  • DNA genes,
  • mixture of types of dementia and how long they have been progressing before diagnosis,
  • specific placement of where the swiss-cheese holes are currently located in the brain,
  • prior life experience,
  • prior IQ,
  • prior functioning level in the various types of activities


Factors WITH options (steps and strategies that person with dementia is taking in order to prolong functioning abilities in the various categories):

  • coping strategies, ESPECIALLY sense of purpose,
  • exercise of mind and body,
  • Meeting other needs for the various neurological, spiritual, social, psychological and biological factors can increase or extend functional cognitive abilities in various ways.

In my personal observations, acceptance of grief process and new or renewed sense of purpose have been the greatest determining factors for cognitive longevity among my friends and relatives with dementia (but getting publically attacked can strongly challenge that needed sense of purpose).

Yes; our abilities will continue to decline, but depending on the various factors for each specific individual, we can extend the best-possible cognitive abilities and quality of life for a longer period into that decline.  … unless we just quit trying to LIVE life.  So let us try to keep our relationships encouraging and empowering.


No person has ALL the facts, not even the medical professionals.  They try, but everyone is human, with human limitations and human mistakes.   i will continue sharing despite nay-sayers, and i hope my friends continue to do so also.  We have a purpose — to help others by opening a window to our world — the good and the bad; the ugly pieces and the breathtakingly-beautiful pieces.  By this means we hope to help others feel less alone
… and give them insight for making decisions and finding coping strategies.
THANK you, my friends.


* Admin issues: SHARE dementia awareness thru buttons below. Feel free to leave your thoughts in the form of comments, but please filter your comments with truthful loving kindness to all concerned. If interested in receiving notice of future blog postings, subscriptions are available through a “follow” button in the upper left corner (MS Explorer) or lower right (Safari, Mozilla Firefox and Chrome). If there is an advertisement below, I have no control over what is shown. My own full legal name is Truthful Loving Kindness. With the new terminology, my current diagnosis is still Mild Cognitive Impairment, but my neurologist said I am in a unique position for helping because I have “one foot in each door”. Text Copyright © 2018-02/05. Tags are: communication, dementia, PWD, relationship, strategy.

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